I like you, but I like your dog better!
I know it's only our second date, Susan, and maybe I'm moving too fast, but I'd like to buy your dog.
— Jason But Eviler (@longwall26) December 13, 2014
Fake dog breeds
FAKE BREEDS I'VE TOLD PEOPLE MY DOG IS AT THE DOG PARK: Venetian Dabney, Brown Feta, Waxbeard, Oxnard Pike, Blue Hustler, High Presbyterian
— Karen Kilgariff (@KarenKilgariff) July 24, 2013
Puppies are the best
I'd pay $10,000 per ticket if instead of people the airplane was filled with dogs to play with
— ♡ Man Who Loves U ♡ (@SortaBad) December 27, 2014
*pets dog* if ur always hapy are u ever truly hapy *pets dog mor* or is hapiness only somthing we see in u bc we kno sadness *dog wags tail*
— jomny sun (@jonnysun) May 3, 2015
[dogs chatting in park] So what does your human call you? "Hoozagoodboy" omg same
— dan mentos (@DanMentos) April 9, 2015
Cats Vs Dogs
Cats are great if you'd like only the unpleasant aspects of having a dog.
— Alex Baze (@bazecraze) May 11, 2013
Overheard on the train – "I'm sure your pug is lovely but it still looks like some sort of other dog was in a horrific compactor accident."
— TechnicallyRaaaaargh (@TechnicallyRon) August 28, 2015